Letting yourself down

by

Marcia-Yoga-125-2825700860-OWhy is it always that we are letting ourselves down? I mean, let’s face it – we set the bar high and sometimes to our own detriment. Here’s the situation – see if you follow..

Over the spring I pushed through a lot. I traveled for my business, I took on new tasks at my day job, My girls schedules got very busy and I just pushed right through. I kept thinking – summer, summer will be the time I catch up, take a break, get ahead, plan, prepare…

So then came summer. 

All those things I wanted to do, haven’t happened. Well, not exactly, You see, I got done exactly what I needed to get done but compared to what I did during the Spring  — I compared it to my “plan” – so, it seemed like nothing was happening.

Small steps vs big leaps. Slower breaths vs faster pace. In the process of it all I lost focus. I lost my connection to what grounds me. I got in my head and I got lost. 

So I sat there – disappointed.

But why? Well, here’s why. We are continually pushing ourselves to achieve more, do more. Success seems to be measured by how busy you are; where you are traveling to; the size of your house; your paycheck. They are all AWESOME things, but sometimes.. no, ALL THE TIME they get in the way of realizing the actual successes you had.

Last summer I could barely do anything. I could barely walk. I was tired. I had been sick – so I gave myself a break. This year, I was healthy, I could walk, I wasn’t tired nor was I sick… so wait a minute…

Why was this not a monumental success? Well, guess what – it is!

It took me turning myself upside down, letting myself cry, letting the disappointment go to realize that I actually have accomplished a LOT and here is what it is:

I overcame a mystery illness that almost took my life. I dedicated myself to a HEALTHIER way of living by removing people, things, crap out of my life so it was simpler. I allowed myself to take breaks when I needed to. I let myself cry and be vulnerable. I let myself fall off course so I could put myself back on it. I put things aside. I cancelled plans. I slowed down. I enjoyed the sunshine. I stopped complaining about the little things (well, i’m almost there, but for the most part this is true)...

You see, this right here is what I woke up today realizing is true success. And then I realized another thing — Sometimes we have to feel let down in order to get back up and realize that everything we really need is right here in front of us – and if we LISTEN – we know all the answers.

Till next time my friends — Go be AWESOME. Go be STRONG. Go be YOU.

XO – M