Do you ever have a strong desire to do something or get something specific in life but find yourself not making any progress toward obtaining it?
You can visualize it. You can feel your desire for it and it’s pull on you. You know you want it. You think you are motivated and you even feel the motivation…
But for some reason, it just doesn’t happen for you.
Or maybe even more importantly, you don’t do much (or more likely, don’t do anything at all) to make it happen.
I’ve been there. We all have to some degree. And if you are like me, you’ve been there many times.
So what’s going on here?
Let’s start by looking at “The Secret” or “The Law of Attraction” as it’s also known. By now, I am sure you know about it. It’s an international phenomenon at this point whereby you visualize (in various forms) what you want in life and it is supposed to magically materialize as long as you keep visualizing it.
“The Secret” has a dirty little secret that isn’t often discussed.
And it’s a secret that is not only important, it’s crucial if you really want “The Law of Attraction” to activate in your life.
So what is this dirty little secret of “The Secret”?
I’ll explain it by breaking it down this way.
In this life we are all constantly exposed to things you don’t have and you’re told repeatedly that you should have those things or should want them, etc. etc. From new cars, to more sex, to less fat on our bodies, to millions of dollars, our lives are constantly barraged with messages that make you feel like what you already have is not enough–that you are lacking in some way, that your life simply isn’t good enough just the way it is.
This is the biggest problem with our modern culture.
All this messaging engenders feelings of desire–which is great.
Desire is something we talk about often at Your Possible Life. We believe in identifying your core desires because once you do that, you gain a clarity about your life–and about where your life should be headed–that is important in maximizing your potential.
That’s a-whole-nother blog post though. Suffice to say that desire is a core belief for us for many reasons.
The problem with the kind of desire that our modern world cultivates is that it’s artificial and superficial–it’s crafted for you and not by you.
It results in you thinking you need some thing because you are led to believe that thing will help you feel better or alleviate some void that you might have.
It’s not that desiring “things” is bad, it’s that we don’t take the time to desire the RIGHT things. You think they are right but only because you aren’t stopping long enough to question the source of the desire–the source of your motivation.
So that brings us back to that dirty little secret–that motivation isn’t enough.
Motivation is great. If it’s genuine and personal. Motivation is supposed to be what gets you moving toward whatever it is you desire. And when it IS genuine and personal, it does do that.
But when we want a new car because the commercial targets our feelings about our past youth and days of adventure and, as a result, we feel that car will help us feel the way we used to feel–when we were young and adventurous–is the car really the thing we need?
I can tell you from experience, an Outback is station wagon that takes you from point A to point B. Mountains and backcountry and outdoor adventures don’t magically appear in front of you when you get behind the wheel.
Only you can make those things appear in your life. You don’t need an Outback to do that. You don’t even need a car to do that.
What you need is a personal motive–not a manufactured motive.
The root of the word motivation is “motive”. To be TRULY motivated we must have a motive. Without a motive, motivation is not sustainable. This is why you and I both don’t get what we think we want.
We don’t want the right things.
If your motive is personal and genuine, you take action because it’s coming from a place that motivates you. I know that seems circular in its logic and yes, it kind of is.
Motivation requires motive in order for you to motivate.
Motive is ultimately about passion–or even more broadly about purpose. But that too is a-whole-nother blog post.
The point–and the dirty little secret–is that motivation without motive doesn’t do a thing for you. That’s why so many people don’t experience success with “The Secret”. They don’t have true, personal motives for the things they think they want.
Have you stepped back to question your desires?
Have you stopped to ask yourself why you really want the things you visualize for yourself?
If not, try it. And when you do it, use the “5 Whys” method.
I guarantee that if you do this authentically, you’ll discover something you don’t expect.
If you want to truly discover your core desires and core desired feelings, put your name and email in the boxes below and I’ll send you updates on articles or events to help you do that.
Learn to find, and achieve, your core desired feelings.
One email at a time.