13 Jun Living Life to the Fullest? No Regrets? Easier Said Than Done…
I believe in living life to the fullest. I mean, who doesn’t? Life is just too damn short.
And as I get older, I really am feeling how short it truly is.
The days go by faster, the years fly by faster, my kids aren’t babies anymore (all of the sudden, it seems), and I’m getting grey hair.
So “living life to the fullest” is sort of taking on a new meaning as I grow…wiser.
But saying it and doing it is easier said than done.
Because, yeah I definitely do NOT always live life to the fullest in the first place and it pisses me off.
And being pissed off is time I am not spending “living in the moment” which is really what “living life to the fullest” requires.
You have to be present and conscious in every moment because as soon as you are not, your more likely letting someone or something else dictate your experience. But that too is easier said than done.
Because that is the fundamental challenge–being present, being conscious, and not letting some external “thing” dictate your reality.
But life is just so damn hard sometimes.
Too damn complicated.
Too damn distracting.
Too many damn demands.
Sometimes it just really sucks and it’s so easy to get mad and forget about all the amazing things that make this life so unbelievable.
I regret those times. I regret getting distracted and forgetting to live in every moment.
But what does that mean really–“to live in every moment”?
First of all, let’s be fair, because like I said it’s “easier said than done”–we are human after all, you and I.
And that means we are impossibly flawed.
But more importantly, we’re also impossibly imprisoned within ourselves and enslaved to every thought that we have. And you know as well as I what those thoughts can sometimes tell you–it’s not always what we want or need to hear.
We forget that everyone else is just as flawed and just as human as we are.
So we get distracted by those thoughts–how imperfect our lives are or how lacking our lives are because we see the marketing message and/or celebrity of the day with the perfect (Photoshopped) body, all the money, the infectious personality, etc. etc. and we forget how much we have right in front of us and focus on how much we do NOT have.
Second, and this is sort of related, is that “living in every moment” is personal.
Only you can decide what that means for you. No one else can tell you what that should be for you.
Yet our culture and our stupid, flawed humanness soooo wants to define it for us–you should have a lot of money so you can buy a lot of things (but only these things that I want to sell you) so that you can look this way so that you can be happy because of course you can’t be happy unless you have these things and do these things and live this way.
It’s f***ing exhausting to be a human sometimes.
So “living in every moment” requires self-reflection and a disciplined filter.
You have to explore what really matters to YOU and filter out all that crap that is constantly trying to define it for you.
But you also have to remember what truly matters.
I’m sure the details will be different for you but for the most part, at a fundamental level we all just want to be happy, feel fulfilled, and feel love and be loved.
I mean, if you had those three things in a way that you felt was “complete”, would you really need anything else?
They are truly the fundamentals to living a full life.
Note that these are three feelings. Nothing material there. Just feelings.
We talk about the power of feelings a lot. And that’s really a whole separate novel I could write but the point is, feelings are really what matters.
Without feelings, we have nothing.
And that, to me, is the key to living life to the fullest–staying focused on your feelings.
I know–all that crap I bitched about before about life being complicated and demanding makes it hard. I get it. Life is not easy.
But the key is overpowering all the external influences and breaking out of yourself–that prison of thoughts–and being present, and conscious in every moment that you can.
And being compassionate with yourself when you do forget and forgiving yourself for that and moving on–back to the moment–back to living life to the fullest.
It’s NOT easy but it is the human experience.
And all you can do is try and come back to the moment as often as you can.
It helps to remember what is right in front of you–your life.
The love you feel, the air you breath, the simple things like the fact that you have a roof over your head and food in your kitchen.
Remind yourself of these things and come back to those feelings whenever you find yourself distracted.
And by doing that as often as you can, you’ll be living life to the fullest.